A Smooth Transition (So Far...)

Well we've entered a new phase of parenthood. Our little girl now sleeps in a "big girl's bed".

Last Wednesday, the bed arrived but we because it required a little bit of construction, we decided to wait until Saturday morning before we made the transition from cot to bed.

We had been "hyping" up the arrival of her bed for some time now so she was quite excited about it, even though I don't think she fully understood what it meant. She knew it meant she would have a pillow and blanket like Mummy and Daddy, but I don't think she knew she wouldn't have the cot anymore.

On Friday night, she asked us - "Mummy's bed? No! Daddy's bed? No! Dota's bed! Yay!" Over and over and over she asked...

During the pulling down of the cot, we had some tears, but they were quickly replaced by excitement when Daddy started working on the new bed.

I'm pleased to say that (so far) she hasn't fallen out, and she seems to be happy to stay in her bed rather than run around her bedroom and play. I'm not saying it won't happen, but so far, it's been pretty smooth sailing.

I imagine some of you longer term parents are having a bit of a giggle right now at my wishful thinking but please let me enjoy it for now!

Reality Check

I just read a really interesting article in last year's Sept/Oct issue of Life Etc magazine. It was entitled "Aim lower!" and basically discusses how "beating your inner perfectionist can help you discover a happier you". It sounds a little "new age" but it really had some basic comments on perfectionism that rang a little too true for me. On reading the article, I accept that I'm not an extreme case, but perfectionism definitely is part of my personality (as my husband and those close to me can attest).

Here are some things I found noteworthy...

• While on the outside things appear well, there is a lack of real joy in the things you do. It's as though the journey doesn't matter - it's all about outcomes.
• High standards are not the problem. The world needs more people committed to striving for excellence. It's about excessively high standards - setting the bar so high that you never feel truly satisfied. This leads to feelings of inadequacy and the lifelong pursuit of self esteem through external indicators of success.
  
• Perfectionists tend to be difficult to live with, not only because they are hard on themselves, but unrelenting standards frequently extend to the people in their lives.
• "Look for the beauty in imperfection".
• Solutions - write a list of costs/benefits of being a perfectionist; catch yourself out (avoid criticism - standards are subjective); get your priorities right; set time limits; choose imperfection.

I think overall the advice could be summed up in two words - CHILL OUT!

Perfectionism often leads to anxiety or worry - whether you measure up; have you completed a task to the best of your ability or could you have done more; what others think of you; and the list goes on and on.

Jesus' response to that was Matthew 6:34 (NIV) - Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

Sounds easy doesn't it, but to those who are in this category, it's not so easy. I guess in a way it comes down to TRUST - that God really does have it all under control and He really wants the best for your life.

Anyhow, something for me to work through. Just sharing my thoughts.

Verse of the Day

If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. James 1:5-6 (NIV)

Time for Change?

Change will not happen until the pain of remaining the same is greater than the pain of changing.

(An excerpt from "Boundaries with Kids")